Dear Me

How are you? 

A year has passed and you have been better.

You are doing well.

It may not be easy..

But remember, it's gonna be better.

It might've been..

A year which was your biggest struggle.

A year when your CPA dream, continue to haunt you.

A year when your job was in question.

A year when your career is nowhere to go.

A year when you were at your deep financial struggle.

A year when the scare of everyone's health was at stake

A year when my parents are for annulment court proceeding.

A year when you and your love had to part ways

A year when you question self, do you matter.

A year when you almost lost yourself

A year when you felt alone.

But among those things, you went through it.

You rose up and even though you left God, He never stopped knocking.

In spite of it all, you found love in God again.

Thoughts at 3am

Sometimes, I don't understand. I am really confused on how to deal my feelings. would i not talk about it or just keep quiet?

If you talked it out, you sometimes let go of words you didn't mean to. You try to apologize but it is so had to take it back. Then you feel worse. On the other hand, if you keep silent about it, then someone would be mad for not talking it out. So what would be the best? If both could hurt the both of you.

There are times when i would choose not to talk, but it makes the other wonder and get mad at me for not talking at all. Then i grow sad and weak. I dont understand anymore how does it has to be. i wanted a peaceful one, but how can i when i myself is confused on how to deal with things.

i cried, not once but a lot of times, trying to understand myself, how i would efffectively communicating with others. i would try to give up, but still had to push myself.